I’ve read quite a few articles and listened to some debates on the whole Lawrence debacle so I have decided to share my 2 cents.
Let me start by saying Insecure is such a great show. Issa and her production crew nails so many real life experiences when it comes to modern day dating. The situations can trigger emotions in a lot of people who have gone through similar if not the exact same things. That to me makes it quality programming.
Towards the end of last season, I was a part of the #LawrenceHive. Simply because no one deserves to get cheated on. I felt for buddy because as soon as his life was taking a turn for the better, his girl betrays him. Then, she didn’t cheat with just anybody (like dolphin face neighbor bae)…..she cheated with a dark chocolate, delectable, two-piece snack(with the biscuit), workable piece of art.
*ahem* Got a little sidetracked…back to my point…
That would mess up any guy’s life emotionally……………..because………fragile…..but that’s another topic for another day. This season, however, Lawrence turned into a guy I once knew and I cannot side with that. Now, don’t get me wrong. I get it. Everyone reacts differently to getting their heart broken but I have no sympathy for this type. As Tasha so graciously put it, Lawrence is a f*** n**** who thinks he’s a good dude.
Here is why I agree with her:
1. Lawrence was never upfront with her about his feelings. To his homie, they’re just having fun. She knows what it is…..right? Wrong! At first, he just spent weekends with her. Then, they’re going on dinner dates. Next thing we know he ends up at the family reunion helping granny out of the car.
2. He took his black behind to that reunion. When Tasha brought it up, that was his chance to let her know he was not trying to take things to that level. Would it have hurt her feelings? Sure. But she would have been able to see where she stands with him. Then she could decide if she wanted to stay and form this “situationship” or leave and find someone ready for something more.
3. He completely embarrassed Tasha. How dare you show up early to help set things up then leave to hang with your coworkers without returning? As if he was part of some setup crew. He could have at least gone back to help break down. Sheesh. Probably had her family looking at her sideways the whole day.
I might be a little biased because I have also had dealings with the same type of guy. His nonverbal communication makes it seems as if he’s emotionally vested but those actions snitch on him every time. He will lie through his pearly white teeth and say he didn’t want to tell you how he felt because he didn’t want to hurt your feelings. Or he may use the infamous line, “I’m not good at expressing my emotions”. What men fail to realize is, this hurts much worse than just letting us know the deal from the beginning. This creates the fine line of hurting a woman’s feelings versus breaking her heart. She’s going to feel like you led her on and to be honest, you did. Whether or not it was intentional.
I’m not going to spend the rest of this article getting on the men. Lol. However, I learned a very important lesson in all of this. Since we all know that every lesson is a blessing, I am here to share the wealth with my fellow good-hearted ladies. I don’t have all the keys but here are 3 ways you can recognize a Lawrence:
1. He simply does not let you in. No matter how nice you are or how much you do for him or how hard you try to make him feel comfortable with you. And nothing’s working? Move on. He may just be guarded, yes, but people will at least try for the one they want.
2. This is common sense but if his actions do not match what he tells you. If he expresses that he wants to date you but you can’t even roll with him to the Waffle House, let it go. Don’t let an “I’m busy” excuse this either. People will ALWAYS make time for what they want. ALWAYS! Men….find something else because that line is played out.
3. Every time you try to discuss where you are or where you’re going, he avoids the conversation at all costs. This is a definite sign that he’s not on the same page as you….might not be in the same book. LOL. The plus is, he isn’t feeding you a bunch of lies about your nonexistent future together, however, you still need to keep it moving.
I saw a meme that read, “She’s too dope for someone who’s unsure” and that is the truth. Until your forever love comes along, continue to live your lives unapologetically. Grease your scalp, drink some water, do some squats, and most importantly…get this money. LOL.